Would you date a much younger man?
“My husband is many years younger than me, and lots of people are questioning that and asking about it. That’s really the only time when age seems to be shoved in my face and I have to give an answer for it. I don’t really think about it that much otherwise. You have to just live a happy life without worrying too much about what people think because worrying is only going to give you more wrinkles.” Heidi Klum
I was reading an article the other day about Heidi Klum’s wedding with her much younger husband Tom Kaulitz when I decided to make some more research and write about this subject that is balancing between double standards. What do I mean?
It seems that the 16-year age gap between Heidi and Tom has triggered a lot of questions from the media circles which as Heidi says, it is the only time that she is reminded that today she is 46 years old. Suddenly nobody comments on her beauty or her successful career or all her other achievements as a businesswoman. All of a sudden she is the 46-year-old woman who married a 30-year-old man, no matter if they are madly in love, no matter that he did everything possible to be with her, no matter if she had doubts as she is a mother of four, no matter if they actually sat down and discussed thoroughly every step they were willing to take for their relationship. But nobody seems to pay attention to this. And why is that? Because we still live with double standards.
Everyone still considers that is perfectly ok for a big age difference between a man and a woman with the man being older than the woman. How many times have we heard about marriages in which the husband is 20 years older than the wife? A real life example is Prince Albert of Monaco who is 20 years older from his wife Princess Charlene. Nobody seems to care or gossip about it. Why? Because he is royalty? I don’t think so.
Why then is such a big issue when a woman dates a much younger guy? And why are the comments more negative than positive leaving the impression that the young man was ‘seduced’ or ‘tricked’ into the relationship by the wicked and more experienced woman? Come on, really?
And let me ask you one more question! Did they have some age boundaries in regards to personal relationships in ancient times all over the world? No, they did not! And let me explain below what I mean!
In 428 BC, the ancient Greek playwright Euripides premiered a scandalous play called “Hippolytos”, about an older woman named Phaedra who falls hopelessly in love with a younger man who also happens to be her husband’s son. The audiences were thoroughly shocked by the plot, nearly 2,500 years ago. Nowadays, we are still confused and curious about an older woman dating or marrying a younger man.
Later, in the 1700s, the most powerful woman in the world Catherine the Great, defied her conservative culture by having an affair with Alexander Vasilchikov, a handsome Russian aristocrat 15 years her junior.
In 1745, Benjamin Franklin wrote a letter to a younger male friend who was reluctant to get married urging him to proceed for the sake of social appearances, but suggesting he should choose a mistress who was significantly older, providing a list of eight reasons why older women were better than younger mistresses!
In my opinion, if two people are truly in love and they want to be together for as long as they wish, there is nobody to stop them from being together besides themselves.
I have many friends my age who are actually pursued by younger men that actually want a serious relationship with them and have true feelings for them. They are afraid to proceed and those few who actually told society norms to go to hell, have actually found happiness with men that yes, are younger but love them and respect them above everything else.
So the question that remains is…Would you date a much younger man?
I am intrigued to read your opinions and thoughts on the matter!
All I know is that if we get a second chance in life to fall in love… we should not miss it for the world!
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